So some guy says the Phillies are aggressively pursing Giancarlo Stanton. It would have to be aggressive, otherwise, they’d just be waved out of the room and a large man in a suit would show them the door.
Rube: GIVE ME STANTON, NOW!!! I’VE GOT NEARLY UNLMITED SUPPLIES OF FRINGY RELIEF ARMS IN THE HIGH MINORS AND ALSO SOME KIND OF KNIFE IN MY POCKET!!! No, I won’t show you the knife. Oh, trust me, it’s a knife. Like one of those ones with the wavy edge? What’s that? Serrated? Am I saying it right? Ser…serrated?
THAT’S RIGHT, I’VE GOT A SERRATED KNIFE, A CATCHER OF YOUR CHOICE, AND A LOWER LEVEL THIRD BASEMAN, PLUS A FUTURE #4 STARTER. DUDE! BRO! COME ON! DON’T TASE ME, BRO!